This is my first journal entry. I hope to make this a regular thing. Since this is the first, it might be a little different than ones to follow.
I have been struggling for the last few weeks with a flare / relapse / exacerbation, though the symptoms never really seem to go away; sometimes things seem a lot more manageable but it's always there in one way or another (or several ways). Something new this time is my right side is very weak. About a year ago my right side was totally numb from just below the ribs to the tip of my toes. And it was just the outer edge of the right side. For example: I could feel my inner thigh but but I could [literally] not feel my outer thigh. But this is not like that. I can feel it; it's just really weak. Some parts feel kind of numb, but not totally numb. Coordination is difficult. Little every day things I take for granted like peeling cucumbers with ease, pushing down the gas pedal, using the 10-key number pad with my right hand, etc. All of these tasks have now become a challenge. I have to slow down and really think.
Besides this new symptom, many of the old ones have come to say 'hello' and remind me they are still there. Burning in various areas of my body. Some confusion. Lack of concentration. Crazy fatigue. Crazy fatigue. Really. Weak. Speech problems. Blurry vision. And so on.
These things happen at others times too, but I just learned that's known as a 'pseudo flare / relapse / exacerbation'. I'll do another blog post on what that means.
How long will this last? It seems everything just kind of stops when this happens. Laundry gets behind. The house does not stay as clean. Projects get pushed aside. Meals become really simple and sometimes odd (oatmeal for supper ... it's easy, fast and still healthy, right?). Errands do not get taken care of. And so on. It's tempting to get frustrated some times, but I have learned to just take a deep breath and praise God for what does get done. As long as I do my best, what more can I do? Nothing but stress out and make things worse.
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